Woah. What just happened.

Well if you don't follow me on facebook, twitter or instagram...then you missed pretty MAJ news! Tripp and I are expecting a baby this September! wahhhhh?! the former not a mom is going to be a mom?  I know, it feels nuts to me too. We are so excited, but so terrified and nervous.

We were VERY surprised! There are so many parts to tell you guys that I may sound scattered but when NOT A MOM becomes MOM TO BE...it's kind of life changing. Of course, when a husband and wife love each other very much...just kidding. Not going there but yes, we're married and having kids has always been up in the air for us until one day...we just woke up and it felt like something was missing in our family of 2.

We decided in August that I would get off birth control and just see what happens. Being diagnosed with an eating disorder at 13, I knew that I really wouldn't know what kind of impact that had on my body until we started trying one day. I NEVER dreamed of being a mom as young girl, I decided as a teenager I never could be a mom and even in college it sounded like something I was never capable of doing. I think a lot of people would hear that Tripp and I were unsure of kids and think that it was based on selfishness but honestly, being pregnant/a mom has always completely terrified me. I quickly discovered around week 7 that it was the whole idea that ALL of this is out of my control now. I don't consider myself an OCD person, by any means. My house is usually in some sort of shambles and I don't live my life by a planner but pregnancy and motherhood is a whole different kind of out of control and I have always been terrified of it.

I think from the moment we started trying in August to January 9th when we found out, I just assumed we wouldn't get pregnant. My period has always fluctuated as far as date so I knew not to get excited if I started being late. I think I was late every month, in fact it became a tradition to take a pregnancy test about 5 days late to kindof jump start my period. It's like my body knew when I would take a test, we would see negative and then about an hour later, my period would start. My Doctor suggested ovulation sticks and said that we could pretty much determined what month we would get pregnant by those. Well...I tried and we tried and finally in December I just said screw it. I'm over worrying about it and peeing on sticks, if we're meant to have a baby then it'll happen whenever it is supposed to and 5 weeks later, we took a test :)

I gave myself the usual about 5 days late before I decided to take a test because by now I knew it was kind of a solid way to jump start my next month/period to start. We had actually just taken in one of tripp's wrestlers/students, a 14 year old kid that would be staying with us for an unknown amount of time, that night Tripp and kiddo went to my in-laws to watch the College Football Championship and for some reason, I stayed home. I was sick, like cold/allergies but I wasn't having any pregnancy symptoms that were noticeable to me yet. I decided while they were gone to take a test to see if, as usual, it would get my period to start. Took the test and went to cleaning out some space for the new resident we had currently in our guest room. 10 minutes passed and I walked by the bathroom which jolted my memory that I had taken the test...when I looked down I saw something that I had never seen before...TWO LINES...I looked it for several minutes confused before running downstairs to where my mom is currently staying with us and showing her. Did she see two lines?! Am I losing my vision?! What is going on?! We just took in a kid for who knows how long! We weren't even worrying about it anymore! Whatttt?! She saw two lines! Okay that's two people that were now seeing a positive pregnancy test. I need to call my husband [I'm seriously impatient, y'all]. I facetime my husband who again was at my in-laws and had no idea I had taken a test, I just showed him the test via facetime and he SAW TWO LINES. Y'all...I was pregnant! Like for real. By all estimations, around 5 weeks pregnant. Of course, I took 3 more tests because it was too hard to believe and all positive. Thus began our journey and we are now on week 16.

I'll be talking more about what pregnancy looks like on me and our whole 2017 so far later this week!
Next up on our list is the gender appt/16 week appt...this Wednesday with a small gender reveal party on Saturday. I'll have so much to share!

Please keep us in your thoughts, prayers, send us any well wishes..Of course, he isn't as scared as I am but he is the one dealing with me so I know he needs it just as much as I do.

Any tips?