heart blog: misfit monday

hey loves!

So another weekend has come and gone and it was a relatively calm one #PTL! Tripp coached the high school football game Friday night, we cleaned the house Saturday and ordered pizza then Sunday church and babysitting the niece and nephew so I don't have anything cool/interesting to share with y'all about my weekend.....EXCEPT this..Tripp and I were able to have a lot of heart to hearts this weekend because of the calmness and one thing we talk about a lot is friendships which leads me to this post.

My entire life has been a struggle with friendships. I know that God meant us to have a life that flourishes with friendships not just a significant other relationship. Tripp is my best friend but my heart has and will always be open to friends. In my life, friendships have been a bigger struggle than dating relationships. I am transparent about my life growing up was not easy so I do understand that it was more than difficult to be a friend during that time. It was tedious, stressful and downright a lifetime movie. So I give friends in my childhood and teens a break...it was hard and I can see why I didn't have any or friends for long.
Growing up I had the Disney afternoon schedule memorized while my brother played outside with his friends. In my teens, I would have a handful of girls that came in and out of my life but most of that stopped by the time I hit my 20s. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am great at making acquaintances. One time I heard  a pastor say that you need to make wells out of relationships and I just have a bunch of puddles {I see you, J. Fox}. At this point in my life I just feel wrecked from emotionally putting myself out there with girlfriends and being left as a puddle. If you would have told 12 year old Lindsay that at 24, she would still struggle with having friends well, I'm just glad no one did because it is insanely defeating. {I realize all the people wanting to make the comment, oh but you were home schooled. Well, making friends wasn't hard...it's keeping them.}
So what is this post about? Having no friends? #reallylindsay?!
No, it's that I don't understand the world we live in where I am told as a being a believer my whole life to go out and fellowship while the majority of girls that have showed zero interest in being my friend were fellow believers. I'm so thankful that I already knew God and His love because I can't imagine how it would come off being shunned as a non-believer. I became very vulnerable while writing this because outside of my mom and my husband, I have not outright admitted that I have no friends. It was hard to write this post mostly because I didn't want to come off as poor, pitiful me or as a freak because what's my problem for having no friends. I write it to relate to not just the girl with no friends, but the WOMAN who desires female friendships and see how they are extremely beneficial but if not taken care of, very harmful. I also write this to female believers, WAKE UP, there are girls NEEDING friendships and completely worthy of them. Who are you to miss out on someone that could completely benefit your life!? I truly have so much in my heart to give friends.



So I leave you with this heart blog. I hope someone can feel less alone by reading this. 

See y'all tomorrow for Training Tuesday {I'm gonna share my soon-to-be lifestyle changes}!